So there I was sitting on the metal bleachers with my new handmade, super comfy, wool, seat cushion. The stadium lights were radiantly shining on the brand new turf, the green fibers of the field, glowing bright and the stark white yard lines were as crisp as the evening air.
I was basking in excitement for this night
For this final season
My son is the quarterback and has a fierce throwing game
The seasons predictions were high and so was the energy in the stands
First, second and third play we are moving up the field like a beautifully choreographed dance routine
Fourth play, my son goes down and runs off the field holding his shoulder
His arm popped out of the socket
He’s out for the rest of the game
A highly recommended physical therapist works with my son, strengthens his shoulder and tapes him up in order to get him back in the game
It’s senior night.
Also the night we buried his nana, my mom
He’s back. He’s ready. He has angels
This is going to be his night to shine.
And then POW!
He gets tackled just the right way and his OTHER shoulder pops out
He’s out for the rest of the game and permanently as quarterback
I’m in the stands, still on my comfy wool cushion, feeling everything but comfortable.
I sat in the bleachers with my head down in disbelief. How much can this kid take?
He wanted to have his final season on a field that he loves so much and in a game that he connected with his dad, so often
I left the game
I was feeling so sorry for him and, if I’m really being honest, sorry for me too
As I approached the stadium exit, I realized I was thinking like a victim, feeling powerless
I quickly shifted gears and asked the universe, “please support my desire to see this in a different way?”
“Please help me find the lesson? The opportunity? How is this happening for us and not too us? Please help me see it differently?”
I arrived home and laid on my couch anxiously waiting for my son to get home
I was sure he was going to be frustrated, angry and unable to make sense of so much loss - his dad(football coach), nana and his final year of the sport he loves
He came home and sat beside me with a better than expected perspective
His exact words, “mom, I think I would really be struggling if you weren’t my mom. I listen to your stuff (I’m a life coach) and I apply it to my life. It helps me a lot!”
My immediate thought: I didn’t expect you to answer so quickly universe. Thank you!
My son didn’t have a successful season on the football field but he’s living an internal win that will last a lifetime
Sometimes our definition of amazing is different from the universe’s
It’s this or something better
Thank you, for the something better…